Neither the weather nor the holidays: the topics that people who lack social skills talk about in a conversation

Emotional intelligence and social skills facilitate healthy relationships with our peers , fair and necessary for living together in all possible contexts : friends, neighbors, family members or acquaintances, with each of them we establish codes that help us enjoy the condition of social beings that we are.

However, there are some cases of people who lack these essential skills for establishing two-way communication in which all parties have their place, where interest is shown in the other person, and thoughts, tastes, and hobbies are shared . But what happens when this exchange doesn't occur properly?

What are social skills and what do they mean in relationships?

What is known in psychology as social skills refers to a set of abilities that allow people to interact effectively with their peers. These assumed abilities include empathy, active listening, conflict resolution , and adaptability to the contexts and situations in which we operate.

As a general rule, most people know how to behave with others, and maintain a conversation in which they tell their stories, but also know how to listen to the interlocutor (or interlocutors), asking questions and showing some interest.

Emotional intelligence, which also has a lot to do with successfully resolving any conversation, is the social skill we have to manage feelings and emotions , discriminate between them, and use this knowledge to guide our thoughts and actions. The problem arises with people who don't practice these precepts, for various reasons.

Causes of the absence of social skills to communicate

The reasons that lead many people to struggle with others are diverse and come from very different sources. These include lack of practice, excessive shyness, low self-esteem, fears, insecurity , and past communication disorders that have not been adequately addressed in a professional setting.

Psychology experts determine that people who lack social skills tend toward egocentric communication , not because of narcissism , but because of ignorance. They tend to unwittingly set limits on communication, which often generates discomfort, rejection, and misunderstandings.

The World Health Organization believes that one of the most common reasons for this communication problem stems from unresolved emotional disorders.

The topics that those who don't know how to communicate talk about

It's not difficult to spot those people who lack the empathy and skills to maintain balanced and enriching communication. In general, these types of people tend to focus their presentations on topics about themselves: their likes, their problems, their preferences, their experiences... they take up all the space, leaving no room for outside intervention.

Those who lack social skills don't just lack the desire to; they simply don't know how to spontaneously show interest in other people's lives... let's just say it doesn't come naturally to them. The problem following this lack of empathy is that the conversation becomes a tunnel, creating emotional distance with the other person and making it impossible to form any emotional connection.

Negativity is another sign, as these people always complain in a somber and pessimistic tone. What's really happening to them? They're expressing low self-esteem and high levels of anxiety. Also, inappropriate and disjointed topic changes are a sign of these traits; and the lack of feedback, a feedback loop in the conversation with questions and interest in both directions.